In The Accident of Stepping Back

August 8, 2015

After the accident, there is more than experience which I foresee. There is reality and a lesson learned.

 

Sunday, I went outside to find and buy a paper clip in order for me to settle my resume, cover letter and calling card. At the same time, make an advance reading. I was determined to finish all workload given to us because I want to build my confidence. Since I had noticed that I became tardy and cannot do my job right.  I thought of rebuilding myself yet here I am neglecting everything.

 

Around 3:30 p.m, I went to the internet cafe, supposedly, to have an advance reading but apparently, I got distracted and just played. After staying two hours and 7 minutes, I decided to go home. I was walking in the street, holding my eight pesos for the payment of the jeep. When I reach the middle of the line of the road, I was about to step forward but I noticed that it was quite impossible to get through. Instead, I step backward. I was confident that I will be safe. But I never thought that stepping back will lead me to a great shock. I just find myself sitting in the middle of the road, looking at my right foot and hearing those people saying “… 961”. It was really a shock that I cannot longer think. The only thing I knew, I was staring at my hurt foot and had the thought that this would be a burden to my family.

 

I was carried and brought to the hospital. The funny thing I remember, while heading to the hospital, I was able to put my eight pesos back in my bag rather than to think of my foot. Exactly 6:07 p.m when we arrived at the hospital. It was a really pain for me to see patients in which bloods flows in their hurt part of the body. I was physically checked by the doctor if there are damages aside from my foot. After the check, my parents were informed. The police came and asked about the incident. I stayed at the corner until my parents arrived. Seeing them nervous makes me anxious.

 

The nurse gave me two shots first of different kind of medicine and another one shot at 7:30 p.m for a test. While waiting, one patient arrived. It was about a seven to nine year old boy. His right knee has a deep cut and you can really see the flesh. It was caused by a falling broken piece of a mirror. Seeing the nurse stitching the wound, I feel more pained than the boy but I never heard the boy crying. Later on, one patient arrived again. It was a 35-40 year old man lying on the stretcher. Do you know the funny thing, the man cannot even move yet the doctor let him sign first a document before examining. Seriously, why on earth would you do that first!? Why not check him instead first? These are the thoughts I have in my mind when I saw that happen. I know I am not an expert and not even a doctor or nurse but can you really do that to a patient who cannot even move? I feel very uncomfortable that time. When the time has arrived, the nurse gave me the last shot. My mother asked me if I want to be confined but I refused because seeing patients in that condition is totally hurtful.

 

The hospital does have an x-ray machine but were not available. So, I was brought to another hospital for the x-ray. There is one sad thing I want to say, the hospital cannot perform the x-ray because we do not have the payment for it. “It is a hospital that neglects patients who cannot pay.” Is this the kind of hospital that really wants to help or is it a hospital that only wants MONEY. Shame on you! F@%* you! Around 8:15 p.m when the payment for the x-ray arrived, then later on performed the examination.

 

After the x-ray, we have to go back to the hospital to confirm if I there are fractures and there is a need of cementing my right foot. The owner of the truck accommodates us with his car and the employee bought all the medicines I need. Around 9:50 p.m, the doctor gave us the confirmations that there are no fractures and there is no need for cementing my right foot. There are just bruises and swelling of the foot. I need to take the medicines (three times a day in one week) until I recover. The owner really had the sense of remorse because he accompanied us in sending us home and he even bought us food. With this accommodations and service we had with the owner is a result of a quitclaim or dissolution of the claim which was done on Monday. Late night, finally home, I can now rest and take the good nights sleep because tomorrow onwards is the second chance of everything in new me.

 

If the staircase that was built through confidence, inspiration, and motivation that leads us towards at the end of our goals, keep stepping forward and do not ever step back. If we step back, it is the pain of falling and the pain of the past we will only encounter. I know it is okay to fall sometimes and reconstruct, rebuild, and step again after a fall but do we want to always to repeat it over and over again? If once or twice we fall, I hope the courage and the strength is still there in you that no matter what happen we keep stepping forward, looking forward, and facing every pain and burn until we reach the end of our turn because our dreams, hopes and love at the end of the staircase are one step closer in achieving it.

 

“First step is new. Second step is complicated. Third step is a fall. Fourth step is pain. Fifth step is retrying. Sixth step is forwarding. And the seventh, God leads us to the very end.”

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Sin

I gave to you my life
Killed myself with a knife
A classic kind of crime
Hanged myself in a lime

I believe in your lies
Accept it many times
For I thought you’ll be mine
And hope that I’ll be fine

Your action’s abusive
Your thoughts are conclusive
You changed me recently
but murdered me quickly

Chaotic as you see
But hatred it would be
Today I will achieve
Revenge! ’cause I believe

The words that I had laid
Opposes what I have said
Helplessly I regret
Hopefully I forget

But I don’t want this sin
I dont want this unseen
Let faith be in the scene
So my life would be clean

//credit to the owner of the photo..

Untold Dreams: Rope of Misery

/*I started writing this as soon as I woke up, a few years ago*/

Who would thought that a man who laugh and find courage in his heart will go for an end.
One night, there’s a strange voice that passes through my door. I cannot express how much would I feel. I just close my eyes and fall to a dream. I’ve been dreaming this man who waves goodbye and say this words “Sorry, sorry that I can’t be with you at the very end”. It was a strange feeling that it seems like a miles apart to reach him out but as I tried to drew closer and hold his hand, he will be blown by the wind and gone.
In the morning as I awoke, I’ve seen my father through the doors. I wonder, was it still bothers him?


I’ve asked him, “Father, is there anything that I can do to help you?”
“Son, would you tie this rope on the walls so I can take a nap and sleep”, he replied.
“Yes father” I replied.
“Thanks Son, would you take care Rhiana for me?” he said.
“Yes father, I will and I promise” I said.


I’ve done what he told me to do but I failed to know the thing that bothers him because as time passes by, I had felt the sudden loneliness in that very moment. As I leave and go to fix my books before I go to school, I saw, I did saw it. There was a tear in his eyes and there is nothing I can do but to ignore those tears, say goodbye and leave.


Wherever I go, I’ve always seen the scenery of my father who cries. Even at school it still bothers me. I’ve been thinking of my father until the end of the day. It was not the usual way it was ’cause back then, we used to laugh at small things. Cry to small things. But reminding it were the big things in our life. If we throw these things back, we stop for a while, pause and look forward for something even greater. We live in our simplest way but because of that, everything has changed.

//Credit to the owner of the featured photo.

Failures to Success: Moving 4ward to God

/*Entry to an Essay Writing at our school*/

 

In every beginning, we step forward for the road we have chosen and take that journey for the life we want. I am very certain that to some extent, things really happen unexpectedly. And I still remember how it was when I first built mine. When I had reached my eighteen years of age, there were some decisions that were life-changing. It was three years back.

 

After graduating from high school, every student is busy deciding for the course they want, and as for me, it took me so long to reach for a decision. I am quite a failure when it comes to decision making and that is the reason why I always fail.  The only remedy I can do is to accept things as they are. There are three courses that were presented to me: Accounting, Education and Information Systems. My mother wanted me to take BS Accounting at X school. I took the examination and passed it. But as soon as I noticed the I look at my mom’s face when she was staring at the tuition for this course, I already had doubt that this will not work. So, I asked mom to reconsider. Meanwhile, my teachers in high school wanted me to take education major in English or Mathematics. I wonder why they wanted me to be a teacher. My voice is weak and I am not really good when talking to someone. Definitely, BS Education is not for me. When one of my teachers told me about City College of Angeles, and since BS Information System is in demand, I took it. I do nothave anyknowledge or skills needed for this course. When first day arrived, it went well but later on different challenges occur.

 

As for my first year in college, it went well. I become one of the Dean’s Lister for two semesters. I was very happy and motivated that this will last until I graduated. But when I was on my second year, things didn’t go as I expected them to. I was demotivated. My grades started to fall and I was removed in the Dean’s List and it last for the three semesters. I was destroyed by people. I was hallucinated by a failing course of action. The dreams that I have kept for so long was lost with just a blink of an eye. Stress, depression and anxiety occur. Everything in me had stopped during those days. I was not able to concentrate. I had realized that I was falling to an escalated commitment with this course. I was not able to recognize it that I was lost in a track for five semesters. If I have just measured things before I decided, maybe I am enjoying my college life for years. Until one day, I was met an accident.I was walking in the street, holding my eight peso coins for the payment for the jeepney. When I reach the middle of the line of the road, I was about to step forward but I noticed that it was quite impossible to get through. Instead, I step backward. I was confident that I will be safe. But I never thought that stepping back will lead me to an accident. I just find myself sitting in the middle of the road, looking at my right foot and hearing those people saying “… 961”. It was really a shock that I cannot longer think. The only thing I knew, I was staring at my hurt foot and had the thought that this would be a burden to my family. It was nothing serious but it made an impact in my life. I was so blessed to be awakened. Stand up again. And continue the plan that God gave me. There is nothing I could do about my course. I won’t shift. I will continue it until the very end and that is the only healing I can do in order for me to stay at good tracking. I have to make sure that I can still pursue the goals I have set when I was in freshman. Now, things are doing well and I am ready to move forward again and pursue the dreams I had built.

 

In the end,whatever plans we have in life, an adhesion to excellence brings us closer to living in success and fulfilling our dreams.  If the journey that was built through confidence, inspiration, and motivation that leads us towards at the end of our goals, keep stepping forward and do not ever step back. If we step back, it is the pain of falling and the pain of the past we will only encounter. I know it is okay to fall sometimes and reconstruct, rebuild, and step again after a fall but do we want to always to repeat it over and over again? If you fall, I hope the courage and the strength is still there in you that no matter what happen you keep stepping forward, looking forward, and facing every challengeuntil you reach the end of your track because our dreams, hopes and love at the end of the journey are one step closer in reaching God’s loving arms.

 

credit to the owner of the photo.

Image

Tatahaking Pag-ibig

“Tatahaking PAG-IBIG”
Ni Benjamin Ligayan

Kung binigyan sana ng pagkakataon
Pag-ibig sana ang baon
Sapagkat minahal ka ng totoo
Sa panahong nagdaan, hindi ito nagbago

Ngunit sadyang nagkaganito
Masakit man kailangan kong magpakatotoo
Kaya paalam nalang ang isasambit Ko
Sa pag-ibig na inalay ko

Gayunman hindi ako nanghinayang
Dahil tiwala ako kay Sir Nes De Guzman (PAPA BOSSING)
CROSSROAD na aking tatahakin
Alam kong ito’y para sa atin

Kaya patuloy ang pangarap ng PANGINOON sa atin
Balang araw ito ri’y ating maaangkin
Dahil sa buhay natin
Siguradong may pag-ibig na dalangin

Kaya magpatuloy sa agos ng buhay
Matuto sa puso’y maghintay
Laging isambit na pangarap ay makakamtan
Dahil balang araw ito ri’y mapagtatagumpayan

Sa NOBELA ng PANGINOON tayo ang bida
Kaya saksihin nating dal’wa ang panibagong umaga.